Riding the Waves of Change

weddingmomentblackandwhiteA large part of the Warrior You Workshops that I lead is about learning to dig deep within yourself and believing that you have the strength to accomplish your goals, overcome your obstacles and live as your true self. For me, this was an uphill battle from childhood. Having had so many major obstacles, lack of love, pain, and hardships I had to relearn to love myself and I had to find that inner warrior.  I can’t say it was an easy journey and it’s something that takes daily work and maintenance but I can look back and be proud of where I am today.

This picture was taken on my wedding day, a day that I truly never thought would happen. I wasn’t upset or stressed out about it, but I just never saw myself married or living with another person, which was ok by me. I had worked so long and so hard to find self-love, to understand who I was and to heal the parts of me that were hurt that I made the conscious decision that I would be happy and content starting a family on my own surrounded by nature and animals.

When I met my wife I found myself once again re-evaluating my outlooks and beliefs because she took everything that I had learned and flipped it upside down. The complete opposite of me in many ways, she pushed my limits, taught me new lessons and I developed new strengths and an understanding of myself that I never even realized was there.  I was forced to once again dig deep and let go of who I was struggling to be and instead allow myself to naturally transition into a safe, new place filled with change. Sure, I was great on my own and I was confident that I would be fine, but there were aspects of life that I was missing out on and didn’t even know existed because I hadn’t yet experienced them. Looking back it’s interesting to see just how life really is a journey, and how you never realize where you may end up. Just when you think you have everything all figured out, Bam! You turn a corner and something new is right on the horizon to test your limits and push your boundaries.

It’s natural to push back, to fear the change and to try to control it, but like me, you’ll see that if you simply let go and let yourself journey through the waves, you’ll end up learning new lessons and exploring parts of yourself that you didn’t know existed.

It’s been a few months since I said ‘I do’ and I’m happy to report that nothing within our relationship has changed much but I can feel myself being pulled towards many developments coming in the future. A new place to live, new additions, new explorations… Each prospective adventure does cause anxiety within me because it’s change, and let’s face it most humans fight against it. I make myself stop, take a breath and remember the greatness that has come from transition and remember that my inner warrior is stronger than anything I could come up against.

The Warrior Within

Warrior Wednesday!

There are some mornings when I wake up and I feel like a complete fake. I look in the mirror and I get these anxious feelings in my gut that maybe I’m not good enough to run a business, maybe I’m too different to help others accomplish their dreams, and maybe I’m too introverted to be encouraging and teaching others.

Funny enough, these are usually the days that I experience my biggest breakthroughs. I give my head a shake, I sit and I reflect. Not good enough to run a business? Hell, I’ve always been told I’m too organized, too type A, too caring, I take too many notes and I make far too many plans- so why wouldn’t I be the perfect person to run a business? Too different and too introverted? Differences and personalities are part of what makes us who we are in life, a fact that I say to all those struggling with their identities. So why wouldn’t I be the perfect person to listen to life stories, to help people accomplish their goals, to see the unique qualities of each individual and help them to stop shunning their uniqueness and instead embrace it?

Feeling inadequate and fearful is a natural response when you’re trying to accomplish goals connected to work, life, relationships, finding your place and so many other situations. The key is not to turn and run, but instead face your fears, stare them in the eye and make your strengths work for you!

Stay tuned for more information about the Warrior You Workshop Series that RetroScripts will be teaching alongside a surprise business in the next few weeks. We’ll show you how to to use your fears, inadequacies, and anxieties to work for you!
#warrior #faceyourfears #strength

Bell Let’s Talk

Bell let's talk

Life can be a joyous, exciting, spine-tingling, and breath taking. Watching the colours of a morning sunrise, experiencing a fresh dusting of snow, breathing in the fresh air just before a spring rain. It’s filled with happiness, peace, and bliss.  But with the greatness of life, also comes the sadness, the despair, the struggles and the hardships.  Life is a word, both positive and negative, filled with so much meaning and emotion that it’s hard for us to comprehend.  The important point for us all to realize is that life is different for everyone, and where some may find bliss others find sorrow.

Today is Bell Let’s Talk day and I encourage EVERYONE to view life through another set of lens, if not today but every day. Show compassion to those fighting a hidden battle, whether it be depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, bipolar… the list goes on and on.  Try to understand why your friend canceled last minute when she promised she would come over, try to understand why the man down the street opens his door day after day but never leaves the front steps.  Imagine what it would be like to wake up day after day unsure whether you can swing your feet over the edge of the bed, or if opening an eye is all strength you can muster for the day.  Recognize that mental illness isn’t as visible as we’d all think it to be. Your sister, your father, your friend, your teammate, the banker, the vet, the CEO, the girl walking down the street to school. At first glance, you see what’s on the outside, the smiles and colour but strip away the layers, settle down into a few pillows with a warm cup of tea and I’m sure they could tell you a different story, a story that could shake your world to its core.

I have read some truly touching and inspiring messages here on Facebook.  To all those who posted, those battling mental illness, those who go out of their way to help others and to those friends, family members and strangers who don’t personally experience but will help shoulder the pressures that mental illness can bring YOU ARE AMAZING. Not only can mental illness be one of the hardest things to live with but the simple act of talking about it can sometimes seem impossible. The pressure that is felt because you don’t know what others may think, how people will react, or if they may look at you differently is sometimes unbearable and unimaginable. It’s only within the last couple of years that I have started to take my own emotional and mental health as serious as I have my physical. For too long I brushed aside the idea that I could think any differently, or that I could actually be happy. Looking back on my rough years, I can remember the many days when getting out of bed seemed impossible, when staying inside alone seemed like the only answer, and when the world was just so heavy that I could hardly breathe. It seemed like I would never make it to see the person that I am today.

bell talk2I’m proud to say that I’m a fighter, and I refuse to let any illness beat me. I’m happy to say that through physical activity, support from those who love me, hours spent looking deep within and outside help I have found my place, and can now work towards helping others live the life they’ve always wanted. I’m excited that I now feel like the badass, fighter of a woman that I often presented to the world (even if years ago it was just a mask). That mask is now gone and the outside reflects the inside!

I look forward to the day when the stigma behind mental health issues is dissolved. In any given year, 1 in 5 people in Canada will personally experience a mental health problem or illness, do your part to end the stigma.